Endless love

I talked a lot in my last blog about how I was always afraid of everything, and I let fear control my life and I was tired of it. I've been taking steps lately to try to let go of the fear, and not worry quite so much about EVERYTHING.

I think I've made some progress. I can't help but wonder though if people aren't viewing my "releasing of the fear" as reckless.

I have to be out of my apartment by the 30th (thats in 16 days) and I've still yet to find a place to live. Normally I would be freaking out at this point, being scared out of my gourd.

But instead, I'm just breathing, taking my time, telling myself that I will find someplace to live, it's just a matter of a little more time. Trying to not panic. The fact that I haven't yet, is a good sign.

But I think some of my friends are panicking for me haha. It's just been very hard to 1) find a place I can afford, and 2) find a place that is affordable and that I don't feel like I'm going to be shanked in the parking lot.

Affordability is big, but so is feeling safe. Because oh hey, guess I gotta tell this blog my life story too... well not so much, I don't want to reveal too much for fear of aiding the "stupid" people in finding this anonymous blog.

But basically, I'm 26, and a single mom to a 4 year old, and a 10 month old. I have been split from their father (my soon to be exhusband) for 8 months. We had been together 9 years.

And he is/was a real piece of work. He was able to figure out a loophole where he basically doesn't have to pay me much child support. So I'm basically trying to figure out how to support a family of 3 on $13k a year.

Yeah, you figure that math out and get back to me, k? But on the bright side, I am now in a very happy an healthy relationship with someone I love very much.

Today marks 1 month that we have been "official" but we've been dating for almost 3 months now. And it's been the most blissful 3 months of my life! :)

But yeah... back to the scrambling to find a place to live. I do believe that everything happens for a reason, and perhaps the reason that I haven't found a suitable place yet is because I just found out that one of my coworkers is looking for a roomate, so that would open up so many more possibilities. Keep your fingers crossed for me, eh?